篇一：小學(xué)英語作文范例及點(diǎn)評

　　My English Teacher

　　Miss Tang is my English teacher. She’s very pretty. She is tall and thin. She has two big eyes and a small mouth. Her hair is long. She likes cats very much. And she likes singing and dancing, too. Her English is very good. We often play games in English classes. She is very kind to us. We all love her.

　　【要領(lǐng)點(diǎn)評】

　　這篇作文的題目是“我的英語老師”，是一篇介紹人物的作文。小作者開門見山，直接點(diǎn)題，首先介紹了英語老師的姓名，然后逐一介紹了她的外貌特征、喜好、英語水平、上課特點(diǎn)以及師生情感等。

　　小朋友們在寫作文時，要注意使用自己最熟悉的詞[組]，以免寫出一些錯句子。寫作時要注意意思連貫、語句通順、標(biāo)點(diǎn)正確、書寫清晰、規(guī)范等。

　　My Days of the week

　　I’m a student and I am in Grade 5.I get up at six o’clock every day. I have breakfast at half past six, and go to school at seven o’clock. I have classes from Monday to Saturday. I have an English class on Friday and I have a PE class on Tuesday. I don’t have to go to school on weekend, and I like going swimming on that day.

　　【要領(lǐng)點(diǎn)評】

　　這篇作文的題目是“我的一周”，小作者沒有說一些空話，而是從自己的親身經(jīng)歷寫起，敘述了自己一周七天的所作所為，并特別強(qiáng)調(diào)了星期天的喜好，寫得自然、流暢。小朋友們寫作文時要注意人稱及謂語動詞的變化，要依據(jù)提示，結(jié)合自己的實(shí)際，寫自己身邊熟悉的事情。

　　I can help do housework

　　I am a girl. My name is Li Ling. I’m in Class Three, Grade Five. I’m very helpful at home. I can water the flowers, empty the trash and sweep the floor. After meals, I can help my mother do the dishes. On Sunday, I can wash the clothes. What about youAre you helpful, too

　　【要領(lǐng)點(diǎn)評】

　　本篇作文的題目是“我可以幫助做家務(wù)”，作者主要敘述自己在家?guī)椭�做的事情，介紹自己的名字，所在年級及在家能做的家務(wù)，很詳細(xì)，到位。

　　小朋友們在寫作時，應(yīng)盡量寫一些親自經(jīng)歷的事情，這樣會避免在作文時顯得太空，因?yàn)橹挥凶约航?jīng)常做的事情印象才會特別深刻。寫作時還要注意大小寫和時態(tài)。

　　My Village

　　My village is very beautiful. There are many houses in the village. Near the village, there is a forest. A small river is in front of the village. The water in it is very clean. We can see some fish in the river. Near the river, you can see a mountain. Some flowers and grass are on the mountain. I like my village. Welcome to my village!

　　【要領(lǐng)點(diǎn)評】

　　本文以“我的村莊”為題描述了自己家鄉(xiāng)的風(fēng)景。介紹了村莊的房屋、森林、河流及大山，使人看了這篇作文后確實(shí)感覺到“我的村莊”的美麗。小朋友們在寫作時，可仔細(xì)想一下自己的村莊或所在城市的特點(diǎn)，盡量使用本單元學(xué)過的單詞或短語進(jìn)行敘述。

　　My weekend

　　There are two days on the weekend, Saturday and Sunday. On Saturday, I often go to my dancing class in the morning and do my homework in the afternoon, and I often help my mother do some cleaning. On Sunday, I always visit my grandparents in the morning and do some reading in the afternoon. After dinner, I often watch TV with my parents. At that time, we can talk with each other and say something happily. We often have a good time.

　　【要領(lǐng)點(diǎn)評】

　　寫法：這篇習(xí)作是按照時間順序記敘周末的活動，記敘了周六和周日的上午和下午分別做了哪些活動及對活動的感受。即：周六上午：舞蹈課→下午：做作業(yè)和幫媽媽做清潔→周日上午：看望祖父母→下午：閱讀→晚上：看電視，與父母交流→感受：高興和愉快。我們還可以選取周六和周日中的幾個比較主要的活動來寫，先說明什么時間在什么地方由什么人做了什么事，有什么感受。再按照活動順序把活動內(nèi)容寫清楚，最后抒發(fā)一下對這次活動或這個周末的感想。

　　時態(tài)：這篇短文我們可以用三種時態(tài)來寫：a.一般過去時（主要描述你上個周末是怎樣度過的）；b.一般現(xiàn)在時（主要描述你經(jīng)常怎樣度過周末）；c.一般將來時（主要描述你要怎樣過周末）。這里我們來表述平時是如何過周末的，所以采用一般現(xiàn)在時來寫。

　　注意：活動的相關(guān)表達(dá)方法可采用舊知識，eg.（例）起床get up，和新知識，eg. Climb mountains去爬山中的un很容易錯寫成nu。還要注意不要出現(xiàn)病句，eg. “I often watch TV with my parents.”不要寫成 “I often with my parents watch TV .” 詞量上控制在50 ~ 80 之間。

　　My Seasons

　　We have four seasons in a year. I can do many interesting things in each season. In spring, the weather is cool and windy, I can fly kites when it’s windy. And I can go hiking with my family when it’s sunny and cool. I like hiking. Summer is hot in the north of China, but it’s not long time. I often go swimming. It can make me healthy and strong. I can also wear my beautiful dresses. Fall is a season with harvest. And I can eat delicious fruits in this season. I can watch the leaves fall. Winter comes, it’s often snowy in winter in my hometown. When it snows, everything is white. We can play with snow and make a snowman, skate and ski. And winter is my favourite season, because of the Spring Festival. I love seasons. I love the nature.

　　【要領(lǐng)點(diǎn)評】

　　寫法：這篇短文是描述“我的四季”，在寫法上，是根據(jù)春、夏、秋、冬四季的更替來寫的，先講明每個季節(jié)的特征，之后再寫在這個季節(jié)中的主要活動或比較有代表性的活動。同時講一些自己的真實(shí)感受，最后闡述自己最喜歡的季節(jié)。在實(shí)際的寫作的時候我們還可以先寫出自己喜愛的季節(jié)及主要的活動內(nèi)容，之后再去講其他幾個季節(jié)，還可以多講解一下地域的季節(jié)特征和大自然中的其他景色，如：秋天的田地里一片金黃，農(nóng)民在收割等等，這樣寫出來的四季更貼近實(shí)際。

　　時態(tài)：這篇習(xí)作講的是“我的四季”，是比較慣常的一些行為，所以我們最好采用一般現(xiàn)在時和情態(tài)動詞結(jié)合活動的寫法。即：在什么季節(jié)，天氣如何，我們可以做什么。

　　注意：在寫作內(nèi)容上，不可以像以往的內(nèi)容那么簡單，因?yàn)橛兴膫�季節(jié)，所以要寫明季節(jié)，季節(jié)天氣，季節(jié)性活動，活動的人，活動的感受等，要求句子順序要正確，在寫作中還要注意關(guān)聯(lián)詞的使用，如用了“因?yàn)椤�，就不能用“所以”，二者不可以同時出現(xiàn)。詞量要控制在80個詞以內(nèi)。

　　My family

　　There are five people in my family. They are my grandma, grandpa, dad, mom and I. Look! Grandma is watching TV. Grandpa is reading a book. Dad is writing an e-mail. Mom is cooking dinner. I am doing my homework. I love my family!

　　【要領(lǐng)點(diǎn)評】

　　寫法：這篇習(xí)作介紹了自己家的家庭成員，以及此刻他們正在干什么，表達(dá)了自己對家人的感情。

　　時態(tài)：由于本單元主要講的是現(xiàn)在進(jìn)行時態(tài)，所以建議采用現(xiàn)在進(jìn)行時態(tài)。

　　句型：主語+be+動詞的現(xiàn)在分詞。

　　注意：本單元的重點(diǎn)是現(xiàn)在進(jìn)行時態(tài)，注意在寫句子時要保持時態(tài)的完整性，即系動詞和動詞的ing缺一不可。

　　A Field Trip

　　It is a nice day. Our class will have a field trip today. The classmates are very excited.

　　Look! Here we are. There’re a lot of activities to do. Amy is watching insects. Peter is collecting leaves. They want to write a report. Mandy is catching butterflies in the woods. Tim and Bob are playing chess. Some of the classmates are having a picnic. There is a lot of delicious food to eat. Oh, who’s that over thereIt’s Miss White. What is she doingShe is taking photos. We had a very good time. I’ll never forget this field trip.

　　【要領(lǐng)點(diǎn)評】

　　寫法：這篇習(xí)作是按照郊游時的畫面來描述的，記敘了同學(xué)們分別在郊游中做了哪些活動及郊游的感受。

　　時態(tài)：這篇文章可以用一般過去時和現(xiàn)在進(jìn)行時來寫。由于本單元主要講的是現(xiàn)在進(jìn)行時，所以，這里我們采用現(xiàn)在進(jìn)行時比較合適。

　　句型：××. is/are doing sth. She /He is doing sth. They’re doing sth.

　　注意：活動的相關(guān)表述法采用新舊知識相結(jié)合去寫。注意時態(tài)的轉(zhuǎn)換、描寫感受時用一般現(xiàn)在時。

　　Li Ying ’S Hobby

　　Li Ying likes English very much. She works hard at it. She reads English every morning. She likes speaking English. She often listens to the radio. She watches TV only on Saturday evening.

　　Does she like dancingNo, she doesn’t. But she likes drawing and singing. Her parents love her. And all the teachers and her friends like her, too. She says her hobbies make her happy.

　　【要領(lǐng)點(diǎn)評】

　　這一篇寫愛好的文章,小作者的寫作思路很值得我們學(xué)習(xí),他沒有具體寫到劉瑩的某一種愛好,而是從學(xué)習(xí)到課余的多種愛好入手,對劉瑩的各種愛好進(jìn)行了粗線條地勾畫.從“愛好”這個角度來看劉瑩的話，我們會覺得這個形象很飽滿。

　　小朋友們寫這種“敘事寫人”作文時，可以從兩個角度下手：一是具體地描繪；二是和上面小朋友一樣，粗線條地勾畫，二者各有所長，另處在行文中使用一些問句，使用一些轉(zhuǎn)述的話，可以使作文更有靈氣，避免了平鋪直敘的缺點(diǎn)。比如上文的“Does she like dancingNo, she doesn’t.”和“she says her hobbies make her happy.”就是十分不錯的句子，使讀者眼前為之一亮。

　　Don’t be against the traffic rules

　　I go to school from Monday to Friday .I go to school by bike at 7:30 in the morning .I must cross two busy roads .If the traffic light is red or yellow,I know I can’t cross the road ,so I wait.

　　If the light turns green, I know it means “Go”, and then I walk across the road .I always ride on the right side of the road .I am never against the traffic rules.

　　【要領(lǐng)點(diǎn)評】

　　這篇作文的題目是“不要違反交通規(guī)則”，小作者沒有說一些空話，而是從自己的經(jīng)歷寫起，敘述自己以什么方式去上學(xué)，在上學(xué)的路上是怎么做的，很形象。

　　小朋友們在作文時注意不要圖大，那樣很容易使文章顯得空洞，而要寫自己身邊熟悉的事情。要注意行文中字母的大小寫、句子的標(biāo)點(diǎn)符號等。

　　I Love My Family

　　Here is a photo lf my family. These are four people in my family. They are my father, my mother, my brother and I.

　　My father is a doctor. He works in a hospital far away. He goes to work by subway. My mother is a teacher. She works in a school near my home. She goes to work by bike. After work, they like reading books. Who is the tall boyHe is my brother. He is five years older than me. He is a singer. He’s now in Beijing. He goes there by plane.

　　I love my family.

　　【要領(lǐng)點(diǎn)評】

　　一個平凡的題材，一篇生動的作文。這樣的命題，我們可能面對幾次，甚至幾十次了。但這位小朋友的筆端很是靈巧，了了數(shù)言，讓一個幸福的家庭躍然紙上，很值得我們?nèi)ニ伎迹�我們能做到嗎�?/p>

　　小朋友的這篇作文除了語言優(yōu)美之外，在結(jié)構(gòu)上也有閃光之處。先總說，將自己的家人逐個介紹一遍，后分說，把家人的工作、上班方式，愛好一一細(xì)說。最后以一句話進(jìn)行概括，起到點(diǎn)題的作用。我們在寫類似的作文的時候是不是也可以借鑒呢？

　　How to get to the science museum

　　We are going to the science museum tomorrow. There is an old thing show in the Museum. Do you know how we can get to the science museum

　　The science museum is next to the People’s Park. It’s isn’t far from our school. So we can go there on foot .Walk straight to the west from our school, next turn left at the post office and walk for about 5 minutes, then turn right at traffic lights. You can find the People’s Park on the right . Walk straight, and you’ll see the science museum.

　　【要領(lǐng)點(diǎn)評】

　　這篇作文的題目是“怎樣去科學(xué)博物館”。怎樣才算是一篇好作文呢？通過你的敘述，能讓別人很容易找到博物館，這應(yīng)是最基本的要求。小作者在文中告訴我們什么呢？首先他寫了去博物館的位置，最后濃墨重彩，指明從學(xué)校去博物館的具體路線，這條路線夠清晰吧！

　　小朋友們在寫這類作文的時候，總有些無從下手的感覺，不知從何說起。其實(shí)介紹路線，無非就是告訴他人某段路的起點(diǎn)和終點(diǎn)，還有就是如何從起點(diǎn)走到終點(diǎn)。要給他人說清楚，你自己首先得清楚，然后再通過自己的敘述，將路線清清楚楚得呈現(xiàn)出來。一定要注意行文中一些關(guān)鍵的地方，如在哪兒轉(zhuǎn)彎，向哪兒轉(zhuǎn)，經(jīng)過哪些重要的交通標(biāo)志或顯眼的標(biāo)志建筑等。這樣，你就能說清，別人也能弄明白。

　　Let’s have a nice day

　　It’s Sunday tomorrow .I’m going to the bookstore with my friends tomorrow morning .We are going to look for some good books .We all like reading books .We are going to eat our lunch at the restaurant. I like chicken, beef and

　　vegetables .After lunch, we are going to the Summer Palace by bus. We are going to play near the Kunming Lake. Maybe we are going to row a boat on the lake .Wow, that will be relaxing. We are coming back at 5pm.

　　【要領(lǐng)點(diǎn)評】

　　怎樣才稱得上是“美好的一天”？有兩點(diǎn)不能忘記，一是安排得充實(shí)，二是安排得有意義。這兩點(diǎn)小作者無疑都想到了，上午去書店看書買書，中午在飯店吃飯，下午去頤和園玩耍、劃船，豐富多彩！文章以時間為線索，敘述清楚，文筆也很優(yōu)美。

　　小朋友們在寫這種敘事的文章時，要盡量給讀者交代好時間、地點(diǎn)、人物和活動等，使文章有血有肉。要看好是寫過去發(fā)生的事情，還是現(xiàn)在正在做的事情，或計(jì)劃、打算要做的事情，以選擇適當(dāng)?shù)木湫�。如果是寫將來的事情，那么就要注意在表述時多用

　　“be going to+動詞原形”這種句型。還有一點(diǎn)也很重要，那就是故事的線索要交代好，讓讀者在閱讀時對整個過程一目了然。

　　篇二：小學(xué)英語作文范例及點(diǎn)評

　　Li Ying ’S Hobby

　　Li Ying likes English very much. She works hard at it. She reads English every morning. She likes speaking English. She often listens to the radio. She watches TV only on Saturday evening.

　　Does she like dancingNo, she doesn’t. But she likes drawing and singing. Her parents love her. And all the teachers and her friends like her, too. She says her hobbies make her happy.

　　【要領(lǐng)點(diǎn)評】 這一篇寫愛好的文章,小作者的寫作思路很值得我們學(xué)習(xí),他沒有具體寫到劉瑩的某一種愛好,而是從學(xué)習(xí)到課余的多種愛好入手,對劉瑩的各種愛好進(jìn)行了粗線條地勾畫.從“愛好”這個角度來看劉瑩的話，我們會覺得這個形象很飽滿。 小朋友們寫這種“敘事寫人”作文時，可以從兩個角度下手：一是具體地描繪；二是和上面小朋友一樣，粗線條地勾畫，二者各有所長，另處在行文中使用一些問句，使用一些轉(zhuǎn)述的話，可以使作文更有靈氣，避免了平鋪直敘的缺點(diǎn)。比如上文的“Does she like dancingNo, she doesn’t.”和“she says her hobbies make her happy.”就是十分不錯的句子，使讀者眼前為之一亮。

　　Don’t be against the traffic rules

　　I go to school from Monday to Friday .I go to school by bike at 7:30 in the morning .I must cross two busy roads .If the traffic light is red or yellow,I know I can’t cross the road ,so I wait.

　　If the light turns green, I know it means “Go”, and then I walk across the road .I always ride on the right side of the road .I am never against the traffic rules.

　　【要領(lǐng)點(diǎn)評】這篇作文的題目是“不要違反交通規(guī)則”，小作者沒有說一些空話，而是從自己的經(jīng)歷寫起，敘述自己以什么方式去上學(xué)，在上學(xué)的路上是怎么做的，很形象。小朋友們在作文時注意不要圖大，那樣很容易使文章顯得空洞，而要寫自己身邊熟悉的事情。要注意行文中字母的大小寫、句子的標(biāo)點(diǎn)符號等。

　　I Love My Family

　　Here is a photo lf my family. These are four people in my family. They are my father, my mother, my brother and I.

　　My father is a doctor. He works in a hospital far away. He goes to work by subway. My mother is a teacher. She works in a school near my home. She

　　goes to work by bike. After work, they like reading books. Who is the tall boyHe is my brother. He is five years older than me. He is a singer. He’s now in Beijing. He goes there by plane.

　　I love my family.

　　【要領(lǐng)點(diǎn)評】 一個平凡的題材，一篇生動的作文。這樣的命題，我們可能面對幾次，甚至幾十次了。但這位小朋友的筆端很是靈巧，了了數(shù)言，讓一個幸福的家庭躍然紙上，很值得我們?nèi)ニ伎�，我們能做到嗎？小朋友的這篇作文除了語言優(yōu)美之外，在結(jié)構(gòu)上也有閃光之處。先總說，將自己的家人逐個介紹一遍，后分說，把家人的工作、上班方式，愛好一一細(xì)說。最后以一句話進(jìn)行概括，起到點(diǎn)題的作用。我們在寫類似的作文的時候是不是也可以借鑒呢？

　　How to get to the science museum

　　We are going to the science museum tomorrow. There is an old thing show in the Museum. Do you know how we can get to the science museum

　　The science museum is next to the People’s Park. It’s isn’t far from our

　　school. So we can go there on foot .Walk straight to the west from our school, next turn left at the post office and walk for about 5 minutes, then turn right at traffic lights. You can find the People’s Park on the right . Walk straight, and you’ll see the science museum.

　　【要領(lǐng)點(diǎn)評】 這篇作文的題目是“怎樣去科學(xué)博物館”。怎樣才算是一篇好作文呢？通過你的敘述，能讓別人很容易找到博物館，這應(yīng)是最基本的要求。小作者在文中告訴我們什么呢？首先他寫了去博物館的位置，最后濃墨重彩，指明從學(xué)校去博物館的具體路線，這條路線夠清晰吧！小朋友們在寫這類作文的時候，總有些無從下手的感覺，不知從何說起。其實(shí)介紹路線，無非就是告訴他人某段路的起點(diǎn)和終點(diǎn)，還有就是如何從起點(diǎn)走到終點(diǎn)。要給他人說清楚，你自己首先得清楚，然后再通過自己的敘述，將路線清清楚楚得呈現(xiàn)出來。一定要注意行文中一些關(guān)鍵的地方，

　　如在哪兒轉(zhuǎn)彎，向哪兒轉(zhuǎn)，經(jīng)過哪些重要的交通標(biāo)志或顯眼的標(biāo)志建筑等。這樣，你就能說清，別人也能弄明白。

　　Planting Trees

　　It’s spring. It’s time to plant trees.

　　I want to plant a tree in our garden. Dad and Mum are very happy. They like green. Dad helps me plant the tree. First, we dig the soil. Then I put a

　　little tree into the soil. Next I water it. I am so excited and I wait for the tree to grow. Two weeks later, my tree has some little leaves. I water it every day. Now it has lots of leaves. It grows fast.

　　We should plant more trees. They make our world beautiful.

　　【要領(lǐng)點(diǎn)評】 小作者寫了一次植樹的經(jīng)歷，但他并沒有單純拘泥于植樹的過程。既有過程，也有感覺，能使文章打動讀者，給人以啟發(fā)。作文的最后一段就非常好，兩句話勝似千言萬語。我們可以學(xué)習(xí)一下這種寫法。 既描述過程，又適時提自己的看法或想法的寫法，在作文中叫做“夾敘夾議”,描述過程為了提出一種思想服務(wù)，提出看法或想法使原本平實(shí)的描述有了意義。我們在以后的寫作中也可以試一試。

　　Let’s have a nice day

　　It’s Sunday tomorrow .I’m going to the bookstore with my friends

　　tomorrow morning .We are going to look for some good books .We all like reading books .We are going to eat our lunch at the restaurant. I like chicken, beef and vegetables .After lunch, we are going to the Summer Palace by bus. We are going to play near the Kunming Lake. Maybe we are going to row a boat on the lake .Wow, that will be relaxing. We are coming back at 5pm.

　　【要領(lǐng)點(diǎn)評】 怎樣才稱得上是“美好的一天”？有兩點(diǎn)不能忘記，一是安排得充實(shí)，二是安排得有意義。這兩點(diǎn)小作者無疑都想到了，上午去書店看書買書，中午在飯店吃飯，下午去頤和園玩耍、劃船，豐富多彩！文章以時間為線索，敘述清楚，文筆也很優(yōu)美。 小朋友們在寫這種敘事的文章時，要盡量給讀者交代好時間、地點(diǎn)、人物和活動等，使文章有血有肉。要看好是寫過去發(fā)生的事情，還是現(xiàn)在正在做的事情，或計(jì)劃、打算要做的事情，以選擇適當(dāng)?shù)木湫�。如果是寫將來的事情，那么就要注意在表述時多用“be going to+動詞原形”這種句型。還有一點(diǎn)也很重要，那就是故事的線索要交代好，讓讀者在閱讀時對整個過程一目了然。

[小學(xué)英語作文范例及點(diǎn)評]